Playing With Time

Have you ever noticed how much time controls us? Time, a concept created by man to create order in the universe, has become a torture device. If you take a moment to look up time in the dictionary, you will discover more than a column of definitions and uses.

Time guides when we get up and when we go to bed, when we eat and when we work. For people like my father, who is slowly losing himself to the past, time is the endless torture of the commercials, which interrupt his programs and make no sense.

Today I sit in wait for the delivery of a washing machine and a dryer, and I have no control over the time they will arrive. For weeks, I have been waiting for my internet to become accessible at home, only to discover that my waiting was in vain, as some ridiculous problem with the modem has delayed access once again. Now, I wait for the new modem, and time passes slowly.

I have only been here two weeks, and I know that it takes time to find employment or create your dream. It takes time to settle into a house and meet people. It takes time to learn your way around so you don’t get lost every time you leave the house. Everything takes time, and yet time seems to move simultaneously too slowly and too quickly for me lately. When I get lost in what I am doing, the morning flies by, and the next thing I know I have to be home to meet Sarah after school. Yesterday, when I took her to her first dance lesson, she wanted me to wait, but that was 90 minutes of time where I would have nothing to do (as I forgot to bring anything with me to work on in the rush of getting out the door and to her class on time).

Time seems to have a sense of humor, as it makes no sense. A minute can feel like an hour when the words don’t flow or when I am waiting on someone or something else. An hour can seem like a second when I am lost in a project or having fun.

But sometimes now I’m unsure how to fill my time. I am not earning money at the moment, so any moment I take that is full of pleasure seems like a waste of time when I have a list of “should dos” hanging over my head. Yet, the time I spend with my family, or pursuing passion, or just dreaming and doing nothing seems to be the most enjoyable time for me at the moment. The time that I take to make my home feel comfortable and become a place where I want to spend time seems valuable, and at the same time, it seems like it is taking too long. I want it done now.

I’ve declared my independence from a traditional work structure, seeking to create and form a career that fulfills me and uses my time well. But how do I declare my independence from the vagaries of time?

How does time control your life, or have you mastered the control of time? Discuss in the comments below, as I have nothing but time to answer. ;)

0 thoughts on “Playing With Time

  1. Pingback: Time IS Relative! « Spirit Lights The Way

  2. Oh, boy, this is something I work on constantly! As an at home writer — I notice time either goes way too fast or way to slowly, and I feel guilty if I do anything fun during work hours but I also feel like I shouldn’t be doing housework during work hours. It’s defnitely a process — but it can be a frustrating one when someone else is controlling your time like the cable guys!

  3. Here I am a stay-at-home Dad….and I still can’t find enough time in the day…… of course, sleeping 16 hours a day might play a small role in that….. :)

  4. I recently started a new job and I just have no “time”. I drive 1 hour both ways, and I really resent that intrusion into “my time”. I got some audiobooks to listen to to pass the time during what would be an otherwise mind-numbing commute. How I wish I could be writing during those hours! On the other hand, my husband is now at home and has taken over most of the duties there (even some cooking – bless his heart). I think I will find a pace and a rhythm that will work, but until them I feel like I am constantly scrambling.

  5. It’s funny how just yesterday I wrote about the time of my unemployment, reflecting on my use of it. Now, with a tentative start date I am pressured to finish projects. At the meeting with human resource I pondered if I had enough time before the start of work to take a trip to Florida dropping the projects all together. But my deepest thoughts of time as of late is when I look in the mirror to see lines on my face and wonder where has all of the time gone?

    I am sure all of your answers will come in time.

  6. Pingback: Back on the Grid Again! « Woman Wielding Words

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